been a while

You're never going to be the person that people expect. Whether or not they say it out loud, or even mean to, people will always pass judgement and set the bar to their own expectations of how you will turn out to be. It's inevitable, but whenever it happens to me, I can't help but feel guilty. I can't help but look at myself and ask "Where did I go wrong?" I thought I do an adequate job at satifsfying other's needs, but no matter where you go, its never enough.

Sorry to everyone I let down. Sorry that I'm not the girl you expected.

How do you solve a problem you feel will never go away? If you truly believe that you are headed somewhere negative, do you keep on pursuing? I wasn't this negative before, but now I can see where I might be headed. I've conditioned myself to just keep quiet and it sucks.

God I really need a personal journal.
At the same time... I only think to blog when some thing bad happens (hence why my blog is empty)
do I really want to hold on to those memories like that?

idk

i have so much to say, but i can't say anything

headache

My headache won't go away.


I'm listening kat and myke play guitar and sing together.
God... if i could sing and play guitar I would do it all the time
I wish I could write. hahaha I have trouble just writing freely
If I could write... I would write about the good things in my life.
The little things too, because those are the best.

Being surprised with my favorite ice cream one day.
"I bought this ice cream because its your favorite"
Being compared to girls he "supposably" had feelings for.
Am I that much better that you question the past?
Whenever I run into him unexpectedly I get butterflies
I'm so lame ha.

The list goes on...
My life is all sorts of awesome right now

God my head is killing me again...
Goodnight

pointless blogettes

I can't sleep
Sometimes people actually cry themselves to sleep.
When I can't get a good cry out I can't sleep
So its 5:45 am... I've tried sleeping
however it seems pointless so I'm back online
In a few hours I'm going to a flea market with my friend...
then I'm suppose to drive to Philly around 10pm...
god I hope I can make it.
I'm gonna try to nap, but sometimes I get really distracted...

My sleeping schedule all break has been odd.
eff me

just do it!

I've been listening to Amy Kuney for quite some time... but I was never completely drawn to her. But lately I can't stop listening to her song "Rocket Surgery"...

"So hold me, dont think too hard about it
Would common sense allow it?
You wait too long and youll lose me
Just do it when you get the urging
Oh its not rocket surgery
When you know you love someone its easy"


ugh. I love it

I'm a zero

I can't even count the number of times I started to blog but ended up deleting my entry half way through.

I feel so alone right now.
I'm home for a few days and I only have an interest in seeing a few people.
I try so hard to fill the voids with other people when those select few are busy
I've been alone almost every night
physically there are people around me
but I feel sooo alone.

I woke up at 4pm today after I stayed up all night miserable
No texts and no calls

I'm so corny right now

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/video/video.php?v=601467631986&ref=nf

He is the reason why

school....

So I've been overwhelmingly busy with friends, boy, FISDU, classes, homework, exams, and work.
I am currently in the middle of writing a chapter summary for FilAm class, but i decided to blog instead even though I don't really have the time. oh dear.

I would kill for a nice week at home just hanging out
All my friends are going home and I'm stuck at school.

Ha, yea I don't have that much time to write!! Gotta get back to work.

Poop

Literally. That is what I'm doing :)
I promise to blog more.
Maybe even later tonight. MAYBE
I'm busy as shietttt. (harhar it's funny because I am pooping)

probably the only decent picture from virginia beach

no words can describe.

describe how amazing my weekend was.

I think all week Chris and I were counting down the days to Virginia and when Friday finally rolled around we overflowing with the lets-get-the-fuck-out-of-jersey feeling. You ever get that? ha.

We left at 12... and it took 6 maybe 7 hours to get there. I'm not sure, I passed out in DC traffic haha. I offered to drive but of course Chris needs to be a manly man and drive the whole way himself.

Anyways. On Saturday we (Me, Chris, Ed- Chris's brother, and Kristi- Ed's fiance went to Busch Gardens! wooooo this is where the immaturity comes out. I don't think anyone was as excited as I was. But all the walking the heat brought out the old fart. I was ready to go home by like 3. Then I passed out for the rest of the day and slept like a baby. :)

Sunday was probably the highlight of the trip. Chris and I spent the afternoon at Virginia Beach in the most beautiful weather ever. Pictures soon aka once chris puts them on facebook and I steal them. I'll make him do it soon. I think I can speak for both of us when I say it was the perfect day. I am now red and my skin hurts ha

locked in

These past two days have been absolutely beautiful. Perfect. But I spent both days inside. And by inside, I mean, confined within the walls of my own room studying my life away. If you were ask me how to describe my living room I would be at a lost for words, however I can spew an endless amount of information about each and every inch of my desk.

This made me realize how incredibly difficult Drexel will be during the summer. It broke my heart to feel the warm spring weather when I met the delivery man supplying me with my dinner at my front door.

ugh. I just want to go to the beach

I cannot concentrate on Anatomy

Lately, I find myself oversensitive to EVERYTHING. Ha honestly, I've always been a little cry baby but I tend to hide it quite well. Except for these past few weeks. Ha. I get sad about the LITTLEST THINGS. I have maybe two friends here who can I can count on and sometimes I still feel like I can't talk to them. I miss home, however, I can't even go home this weekend because my parents are in Florida.

Also, it doesn't help that I feel like everyone is snapping at me and giving me attitude. I get home almost everyday and I just want to go to bed because I wanna punch everyone.

FACKKKKKK

developmental psych

Yes... I'm in class.

Why hello blog <3
It's been a while.

I have been feeling quite inconsequential thus no reason to post.

Lately, I feel like a couple people that mean a lot to me have been missing lately in my life. I just want to let them know that I still need them in my life and I'm here.

Apparently spring coffeehouse is possibly this month. I still have to desire to take part in that. Singing for a group of people is not for me. No... sometimes I don't mind. It's "performing" that just doesn't appeal to me. I don't write my own music nor do I measure up to the people whose songs I would consider covering. Not to mention I get ridiculously nervous and I sound like I'm gonna cry. Not.For.Me. So please please stop asking.

I should really pay attention........


I apologize for this horrible excuse of a post lol

Friday! Finally

Last day of work!

more importantly first day of FIND!







"You can’t give people pride, but you can provide the kind of understanding that makes people look to their inner strengths and find their own sense of pride."
– Charleszetta Waddles







The purpose of this years Conference is to educate delegates about the origin of Filipino pride, how it relates to the current times, and how we hope it will effect the future. On Saturday, We start off the day with the first session entitled "What we did," a session in which the delegates will learn about historical events and accomplishments that have created the foundation for our Filipino Pride. Our pride will have an even deeper meaning than before. The second session entitled "Who We Are Today" will enable delegates to make a connection with Filipinos who have made great achievements. The goal of this session is to inspire delegates to have a positive feeling of Filipino pride. The final session is "What Does the Future Hold." A self reflection period for delegates to plan goals for their future.



A lot of hard work has been put into this conference! I'm excited to see how everything turns out!

Waffles

Go to Bonte. AMAZING <3

I got a waffle with banana.

its the coldstone of WAFFLES

the bananas were INSIDE.

amazing.

love is like.

Yesterday, I was having quite the conversation with a very good friend of mine. We talked about how love is so easy to hate, miss, momentarily forget, etc etc, and how love is so easy to love.

No matter how much a girl will try to convince herself and everyone around her that she is perfectly happy without a significant other, I quote my fellow lovetrashing/longing guru friend, “at the end of the night it always catches up to them like hm just me in my bed. Always just me in bed.” Although us girls are perfectly capable of being happy when single, there will always be that void that can’t be satisfied simply with a tub of Ben&Jerry’s Half Baked Ice Cream.

Feeling gloomy from being single is like a dormant disease. For days, weeks maybe even months at a time I would feel fine. Everything seems normal, and I’m happy then all of a sudden its like- BAM I am single! You mope like a baby, its all you think about. You catch yourself thinking about all the good moments in past relationships when it used to be SO easy to remember the bad. However I have a boy now. Lol So this is just past experience for blog purposes.

That makes me sound kinda hypocritical. But that’s how everyone is. They will talk about how much relationships suck, and boys suck, and there is no point for a relationship… but seriously… its in our nature to find our match.


In high school I had a horrible boyfriend. But I was naive and young and I fell for him. I thought I was in love. Stupid I know. But I’ve learned from this experience. I was talking about this with boy and I explained…
My ex was crazy. He was controlling- if he didn’t like what I wore I was told to change, if we wanted something but was to lazy to get up I had to get it even if it was on the other side of the house, he doesn’t like it when people sing, so I wasn’t allowed to sing along to the radio. A lot of stupid things that I shouldn’t have been around to experience. He was super over protective and jealous and would read my text messages with out asking. We fought everyday about big and little things but I stuck around for 8 months (officially I don’t know how much longer unofficially).

When I was done talking about it. Boy turned to me, his face twisted with confusion, “You were happy with someone like that??”

I thought I was, but, No I was not happy. It was a bad year for me. Senior year could have been better.
However I know what I DON’T want in a relationship now. But in all honesty, since something like that happened to me, I’m glad it happened early on. I know exactly what to stay away from in the future as opposed to being seriously involved with someone like that when I’m older and looking to settle down.

Love is the disease and love is the drug.

8 mile

greg: do u have some free time?
me: right now
yeaa i think i can manage some
greg: would it be too bold
to suggest a rap battle?

I have known this kid since...7th grade.
He is the whitest of the white.

greg: ok
ok
yo
yo
yo
ok


So apparently its spring? I'm still wearing my winter coat :(

spam

Jesus christ 3rd post of the day. Sorry but try to keep up beeyotch.

Actually this is just a video.




the video is messed up too. Idk how to fix it :(

I am in no way shape or form a performer. I just do this stuff for fun with my friends.

gchat, binders, and sex

I want to meet the person who came up with gchat&aim.

&& Make love to that person.

If it wasn't for you.. I would not make it through the work day.

I have approximately a half hour till I complete my work day. And I'm gonna write as opposed to stuffing binders (which I have been doing all week).

This job=papercuts :(

I would really like to enjoy the weather.

Also, can someone... anyone... tell me how to get a video from the internet up!? Haha I thought i knew how. Apparently not.

ANYWAY. I had a bizzare AIM conversation today with a complete stranger.
It's quite long. I'll break it down quick and easy.

This person IMs me and asks who I am because my sn showed up on his buddy list.
I figure maybe its an old friend... I can't think of any other reason as to who would have my sn so I say my name is Ally Hardy.

Well I was wrong and he doesn't know who I am. Hahaha. I have no idea who he is either.

HE STARTS ASKING ME FOR A PICTURE!?!?
Since he already knows my name I told him to just check facebook or something.
Of course he doesn't have one.
Then he insists on sending me a picture... So i give him an old email address. One I never use anymore.
he says "alright sent a picture. its kind of shirtless though..which i admit to be lame lol"
Wtf. I don't even bother opening the picture, I just took a quick glance at the thumbnail and I tell him that I still dont know him.

Oh my god. This kid still wants to carry on a conversation.
He's asking me what I like to do for fun, what I love, what I hate, where I work.

THEN. He asks....
"have a boyfriend or singleeeee?"

I reply...
"in the middle"

He tells me he's been single for a month...
Shit gets weirder...

person: weird not having sex though haha after 2 years of steady sex but whatever! thats an adjustment lol
me: hahaha im sure you'll be able to manage
person: haha i hope so!
me: hahaa
person: lol well at least youll be entering the days of steady sex. at least one of us will survive ally lol
me: i guess i should speak for myself then haha
person: lol what?
me: expression. meaning i cant really say whether or not you'll make it
person: lol well i hope i dont die from a lack of sex. i dont think the penis ACTUALLY falls off haha
me: hopefully you'll be fine. fingers crossed

seriously?
Conversation OVER.

Dad+facebook=WTF!?!?!

My dad has a facebook. This is wrong.
I have nothing else to say

Happy St. Patricks day (& edit)

"Everyone is Irish on St. Patricks Day"

Ok.. I AM Irish but uh... I've realized that I really don't know anything about being Irish. Not that he really celebrates it since Irish isn't a minority... anymore.

When the Irish first came to America they were considered a minority and scoffed at. They were considered dirty and were looked down on. The stereotype of "being an alcoholic" was more of a reality back then... consider it an outlet. Over time however, Americans accepted the Irish basically because they looked similar. Since when did "being an alcoholic" become an accepted joke among Americans. As long as you have light skin alcoholism isn't an issue?

Now, Filipinos. Do you think they will ever be "absorbed"? I know that we all aim for equality, but I'm scared that we will one day completely lose whats left of our culture. Then again, filipinos don't have blonde hair and blue eyes (naturally).

I say "they" because I don't really know where I fit in. According to my Filipino friends I am the "white one" and to my caucasian friends I am "the asian one." Yes... I was the token asian in high school.

Anyway with FIND coming up I'm very excited to learn more about my Filipino history.

I know... people will probably read this and say
"What the fuck Ally... you LOOK white... Like really? Do you REALLY face difficulties??"
(That has in fact been said to me)
Shut the hell up, I've dealt with shit too.


Love

"That chinese mother fucker"
(A term coined by a very NICE person when referring to me.)
(I lied he's a douche who doesn't like me because I'm half Filipino)

Poor excuse of an Irish girl
I barely drink hahaha.
And this is what happens
Regardless... Happy St. Patricks Day

Break your phone & start fresh.

So. I broke my phone. Horribly. Like... cracked screen couldn't see a damn thing horribly. On Saturday I went to Verizon and when I got a replacement I learned that I had lost eveyrthing on my phone. (aside from phone numbers) I was not upset about losing my ringtones, or random pictures. However, I was crushed when the "No Videos Saved" alert basically slapped me in the face. I had lost all my videos from my old job.

Refer to an older post from February "Full Time Jobs Suck" to see how much that job meant to me, and how much those kids still mean to me.

Those videos were the last form of interaction I have with those kids. The kids I spent every day after school with my senior year of high school, and basically everyday in the Summer of my senior year AND freshman year or college.

I spent my LAST summer break ever working with children with autism and I do not regret one moment of it.

Its been so long since I've been able to go back and visit. Those videos meant so much to me.

One video in particular
My buddy Brandon was holding both my hands in his and singing "I wanna hold your hand" by the beatles.

This video genuinely made me happy no matter how bad my day went.

NOW my phone is a blank slate. Completey empty and ready for new pictures and videos.

oh dear..

I think I am singing on Ben's radio show this Sunday. Hahahaha... interesting.

Honestly. I don't know where this came from. I never everererrr sang in high school. In fact, when my high school friend came to visit a few weeks ago, chris was just fooling around with the guitar and I was singing a bit and she goes;
"Ally where did this voice come from!? I didn't know"
I've known this girl since like... 8th grade.
So... tune into Bens show this Sunday. I actually don't know anything else about it... like what station or what time. I guess i'll update that later.

I don't really have any songs either.
Matt White- "love" is probs a yes
Sara Bareilles- "Vegas" is actually probably a no.. haha i always mess up
uh. help.

If i were a _____. I think I could understand.

I'm too scared to sing "boy" its so loud and high. :( :( :(


My number one peeve is probably when people use the phrase “OH I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL” in a serious conversation. Then they proceed to try to relate some stupid ass story that may have some relation, but not EXACT relation... soooo just stfu. My friends, if someone is going through a difficult situation, that is probably the worst possible time to one-up them.Whenever someone says that I want to end the conversation then and there. And from then on, I know that I will never want to talk to that person about something bothering me again. Haha. Harsh, but I dun giiiive a shiet.

ANWAY.

Yesterday was Fisdu’s Halo Halo night. Put that on the list of food I don’t like. It also bothers me when people keep shoving spoonfuls of Halo Halo in my face.

“Try it Ally!”
“I have, I don’t like it”
“Are you sure? Just try it”

Uh.. Yes, I am sure. Ugh annoying!

We also did karaoke. I am not capable of scoring higher than an 80.

Staple this motha fucka

So today at work, while I was playing with the mechanical stapler (coolest office supply ever) I came to realize that I haven't blogged in a day. Then I realized that I needed to pee.



I remember when there was no you
My sky was gray when it should have been blue
So many struggles livin day to day
No where to run, just so I could get away

I remember when I saw you face
The sun came out and brightened up the whole place
My heart is racin’ troubles erased and
Boy you got me sayin

Get a grip, don’t trip
Too late I’ve fallen baby
You make it hard to cry
Can’t help but smile
I feel the sparks when we meet eye to eye
Got my stomach filled with butterflies

I wish I could have a snow day

“There’s too many things I haven’t done yet, too many sunsets I haven’t seen”- Sara Bareilles

I kinda love her. No lesbo?

I love the snow. I wish I wasn’t cooped up in my little cubicle in the corner of the office. I’m a child at heart and sitting at this desk all day just isn’t for me.

Im slowly going crazy and playing with clips. wtf man.

So lately, whenever I happen to meet someone at a party they always say "Find me on Facebook." And its not the kind of comment where they are like blahblahblah find me on facebook so I never have to talk to you again... instead they find ME on facebook and message me nonstop. That happened twice this weekend, and maybe 3 times last weekend. Not to toot my own horn- since none of them were attractive and I really couldn't care less. But I wonder, what goes through their minds when they say that? Do they think it's honestly a good idea? What happened to asking for a number? Not that I wanted to give it, I'm just wondering... Since when has facebook become the way to pick up girls? Facebook is what sparks relationships now? Gross.

I'm just trying to keep in touch with friends, not find the love of my life through facebook

Good Morning Sunshine

me: mornin
greg: gooooddd morning!!! how are ya?
me: goooooood, so sleepy
greg: u need a monster! i have a case in mah room
me: uh i need one
greg: ill teleport it to u now
me: i didnt get it
greg: oh boy
this is gonna be embarassing
me: lol what what
greg: i think i sent it to the wrong place
me: oh dear

This kid always manages to make me smile.

SO its only Day 2 of Lent
I almost bought a bagel today because I forgot. I was walking into the deli so excited for my breakfast sandwich and then I remembered that I gave up bagels for Lent. I ended up leaving the deli empty handed because I got really sad. HAHA I am so lame.


Another note.
People have been telling me to do D5 coffehouse but I'm such a chicken. Ben asked me to be on his radio show this Sunday, but I'm to scared for even that!! Its hard for me to feel confident as is, and when I'm surrounded by friends who are so musically and artistically talented it makes it even harder. I am a baby.





Am I loser for being really excited that I have 5 followers :)

Rambleramble

To an outsider looking in, everything seemed normal, nothing out of the ordinary. But one scratch on that thin, superficial surface revealed nothing but tension and almost no form of order. I was a mess. There seemed to be no sunshine in my life, but I was damn good at making it seem like there was. I smiled as the words flow out so naturally, but the excitement and emotion portrayed by my peers just did not phase me. I was a mess but no one knew. My last few years in high school were a lie.

When it came to my friends, I always felt like I didn’t really belong there. I would constantly jump from one group of “best friends” to another. I didn’t know what to hate more; the fact that I kept turning my back on people, or the fact that sometimes I felt like they never fully embraced me. I think I grew closest to my friends from home after high school ended. We took all our old memories and used them to create a bond with almost no weak spots. In one of my previous entries, I mentioned that my friends from freshman year of college are far from friends now. Last year, that thought never would have crossed my mind. It’s funny how things work out. Fingers crossed that it won’t happen again.

What most people don't know about me is that, back in high school, going to school everyday was a haven for me. Life at home wasn't great and I just didn’t want to be there. I did what I could to stay out of the house. I played softball in the spring, and on the off season I would stay after to do homework, or just hang around.
It’s hard to explain the tension I dealt with.
Tension between myself and my brother
Myself and my mother
Myself and my father
The tension between my mother and my father
All of it was hard to deal with. And all I wanted to do was avoid it. If you think its a typical family fight then don’t ever bring it up to me because I will never want to explain it because I’m not going to trust you to understand me.
It’s hard to explain. I'm not going to go into detail via internet about specific problems, that’s more so for my close friends. I'm also very picky about who I tell. But the hardest part of dealing with it is over for me. It’s behind me. There is still a lot of tension, but I’ve learned to ignore. I’m too scared to put it out on the table. Maybe the hardest part has yet to come- confrontation.

But for now, and for the most part, sophomore-year-of-college Ally is a happy camper. I’m a much different person, and I’ve grown since last year. And I’m really tired so I’m gonna make coffee now.

One more thing

Happy Birthday Kylie
There's a party in heaven tonight.
FEBRUARY 24, 1989 - DECEMBER 28, 2007

I misssss youu <3

Full time jobs suck.

I think I just snored a little.
I'm at work.
I just drooled a little.

I am so tired that it's making me dizzy and it hurts to try to keep my eyes open.

I hate this job. For the non- Drexel student, most majors at Drexel University offer a "co-op" which is basically an internship. The work experience is one of the major reasons I came to Drexel. My co-op is for two terms and I work full time and it sucks ass. I don't do shiiiiit related to nursing. My next task of the day is to put away supplies. SUPPLIES. Not even supplies you find in a hospital. No. I'm putting away paper, and pens, and binders and shit.

I've fetched lunch a couple of times too. fml.

I'm a nursing major. Not a paper pusher, or a personal errands girl. This job makes me feel like nothing because that is all I do. From 8:30am- 5pm I am someone's bitch.

I miss my old job. I recently directed my friend to work there and I grew sad as I explained what job entailed. It's been a while since I've seen my buddies at work and I miss them so much.

For about 2 years, I worked closely with kids who have autism. Most people don't understand the social disorder and many are afraid of indivduals affected by it, but I saw something different. Just a child misunderstood. I loved spending my time growing close with these kids and gaining the their trust. I loved watching them learn new things because I was proud of them and myself for being there to help. I loved helping them through rough times because they honestly helped me as well.

I think what I love and miss the most is the feeling I get when the students know exactly who I am and run up to me excited to see me. Their smiles and laughs are contagious. I love that feeling I get when I can hear MY name being called from a different room because I'm the one they are searching for. That certain satisfaction of knowing that I've touched the heart of an individual with autism.

This one boy in particular remembered all our little jokes even after I had been away for a few months. He has a very limited vocabulary but we're still able to communicate in a more meaningful way. It meant a lot.

Welcome to the grown up world Ally.

That reminds me of that one episode of the Rugrats... You know which one I'm talking about? They are grown-ups and all hell breaks lose.




edit:


I just made a ton of copies.

What I realized over ther weekend

Old and new friends... whatever... I can't live without them.
If a close friend is sad, I am sad. You happy, I happy :)

Being able to see two familiar faces this past weekend helped me realize that I'll always have friends who will have my back no matter what. No matter the distance, or the time spent apart, "awkward" will never be a word to describe our friendships.

And regarding my new closest friends... You guys make me happy to be where I'm at today. Freshman year my life was so different, and almost everyone I met in college is far from a friend now. This being only my second year of college, a lot has changed. I've met a lot of sketchy people in my life, but this is a 180. The only think I hate is that a handfull of you fuckers are older than me. Old enough to go out without being questioned, or old enough that you are closer to graduating. To those who are closer to my age- do not fret, for I love you as well <3



Rip Ky

What if.......

The infamous “What If” game. Usually a harmless little game to pass time, have a few laughs with friends while you create complicated and unreal situations. However, there is seriously a dark side to this fucking game. Do me a favor and make sure you say game as sarcasticly as you can. The “What If” game can lead the mind to twisted and sick, almost heartbreaking, thoughts. Sometimes, my own thoughts are what hurt me the most. What if someone hated me enough to do something really mean? What if I was in the hospital? What if I was in a coma? What if… the sadistic questions could go on forever.

I promise you guys that I don't sit around waiting or forcing these thoughts. I would say they usually come when I'm laying in bed trying to sleep. My mind wanders to the moon and back collecting and trying to understand every little thing on the way. I think I need to calm the eff down and realize that it’s all good in the hood. I have a solid group of friends that honestly keep me sane when my own mind can’t handle a stupid “What If” game. YES people would visit me in the hospital. Phew. All better.

I had quite the serious talk about this with a good friend of mine today. Definitely consider him as a close friend, almost like a brother. We are too hard on ourselves boy.


"I'm just having conversations
with the thoughts in my head
all I hear are angels crying
oh won't they just sing instead"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lnio-pqLPgg

This is the first thing that popped into my head after that conversation.

Lent is coming up!

Pointless shit. (not lent, this entry)

As most of you know... I'm a pretty picky eater.

I Will Not Eat...

• french fries
• ketchup
• mustard
• honey mustard
• pancakes (I only like chocolate chip)
• maple syrup
• FISH ew
• shrimp
• crab
• hot dogs
• ham
• roast beef
• yogurt
• red & green peppers
• white chocolate
• grahm crackers (except when making s'mores)
• tomatoes
• most salad dressing
• etc... I can't think right now

haha.. I promise I'm not impossible to please.

My closest friends know that I lovelovelove bagels. mahal ko ang bagels. I actually just had one for breakfast and it was delicious. BUT, I know that bagels are so bad for you. They are jam packed with carbs and they are difficult for the body to break down and digest. So with lent coming up I've decided to give up bagels. With that decided, this morning I made my gchat status "I'm giving up bagels for lent."

These are the reactions I got:
p.s. most of these were used instead of the conventional "hi"

Peter: haha u can't do it
Chris: lol are you really gonna do it?
Katrina: really? but you love bagels
Gail: you are giving up bagels for lent? haha
Allen: NO WAY areyou really? brave
Kimmy: and wtf bagels/! forreals/!
Edel: u'll starve

Oh the irony: My boss got me a $20 gift card to Dunkin Donuts

I disregard the fact that bagels are exteremly unhealthly when I eat them. They are cheap and taste damn good! But I'm hoping that once lent is over, my desire for these round morsels won't be as strong haha. If I'm grumpy for the first week of lent... I'm apologizing ahead of time

No lie. I totally just drooled.

Bee. Tee. Dubs. I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE WOLVERINE MOVIE

oh... and when does lent actually start? hahaha

Valentines day

I hate work.

3 or 4 years ago I had a livejournal which I wrote in everyday. Granted... almost every post was me whining like a bitch but regardless, I miss just typing away. I tried searching for my old username on livejournal but I can't find it haha.

Anyway

This past weekend was Valentines Day weekend. It really was just another regular day for me, I did not hate it, nor was I excited. I actually did get someone a card though, but I chickened out on giving it to them even though it was silly hah.
The actual "holiday" was spent with good friends at a Mexican restaurant. We were crowded in the corner by the bar and I'm sipping my margarita sitting on a barstool waiting for a table when all of a sudden I hear an "excuse me" coming from behind my friend. I turn to look and its some older girl sitting on the other side of him trying to get MY attention.

girl: Hi I really like your sparkles!
me: [took a while but i realized she was refering to my... necklaces] thanks
girl: Your sparkles are so pretty. I really like your sparkles.
me: Thanks a lot.
[I turn back to my friends who are clearly suffocating themselves to contain their laughter]
girl: Excuse me, I'm sorry you probably think I'm so rude, I really like your sparkles
me: Thank you
girl: What's your name I'm Kim [hand shake]
me: ally [and i return the hand shake pissed off because I know if I gave a fake name someone would call me out on it]
girl: I'm here all by myself my friends were suppose to come join me but they can't make it anymore and I'm just here alone so I figured I would at least have a good time.
me: oh that sucks
girl: I know! So I decided to have a margarita and a beer and just take a cab home later. I live kinda far so it sucks taking a cab ride all the way home its like a $30 cab ride that I have to pay by myself.
me: that sucks [I turn to my friends again who are now all blue in the face]
girl: So whats your name?
me: ...ally
girl: You're so nice, its hard to meet nice people in Philadelphia I go to school at DREXEL [of course, of course she goes to my school. fml- luckily she doing clinical rotations lmao] and its hard to meet people sometimes, but you guys are so nice.
[allen starts talking to her to try and save me and I turn back to the rest of my friends]
[no good]
me: Yea so my friends aren't coming and I'm here by myself but you guys are so nice, and I really like your sparkles, I'm so jealous of your sparkles
ally: I like necklaces..

She went on and on about the same shit... but that is basically what happened till she just got up and left.

my friends decided....
"sparkles" = boobs
"I live kinda far so it sucks taking a cab ride all the way home its like a $30 cab ride that I have to pay by myself."= Come home with me
my friends now end every sentence in dyke when talking to me.

Probably one of the most awkward situations in my life.

edit:

Greg: hahahahha
lololol
"i like yo sparkles gurrllll"
im picturing
like
a girl version
of the "can i getcho number" guy